Just hanging out!
missin somebody a lot but not wanting to seem clingy
This is what my husband and I purchased at the grocery store the other day.
We don’t have kids.
We are adults. We pay bills.
And drink water from a whale.
Money whale spent
IF SOMEONE MAKES YOU FEEL BAD FOR THE BANDS YOU LISTEN TO OR THE WAY YOU TAKE YOUR COFFEE OR HOW YOU WEAR YOUR HAIR OR WHAT YOU WEAR OR THE WAY YOUR LAUGH SOUNDS THEN FUCKING DROP THEM LIKE THE PIECE OF SHIT THEY ARE AND GO FIND SOMEONE WHO THINKS YOUR LAUGH SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST GODDAMN SONG THEY’VE EVER HEARD AND OFFERS TO MAKE YOUR COFFEE FOR YOU AND THINKS YOU DRESS LIKE ART
#if a cat and a dog got married this is what they would look like
that is actually a perfect description
Katie Kacvinsky (via wank-r)
Me: *looks at phone for 10 seconds*
Adult: WOAH GEE GOLLY YOU CANT GO 10 MINUTES WITHOUT DIGGING YOUR HEAD IN YOUR PHONE CANT YOU
I bought my friend an elephant for their room.
They said “Thank you.”
I said “Don’t mention it.”
Is there a joke here that 15 thousand people get but I don’t?
today i heard 2 kids talking about buying fake IDs after school and so i started eavesdropping cuz u know thats big kid stuff and then one was like “yeah but is all this really worth it like im pretty sure the fake IDs cost more than the fish we r gonna buy”
to buy fish at petco u have to be 18 or older
they were going to get fakes to buy fish
its a knife holder
#everyone’s a knife holder if you try hard enough (x)
*whispers* Mulan, Merida, and Rapunzel didn’t have men saving them
*regular voice* Lilo and Nani’s sisterly love for each other was a big point in their movie
*slightly aggravated voice* Enchanted questioned marrying a man you hardly know
*shouting* FROZEN ISN’T THE FIRST MOVIE TO HAVE THESE POINTS
my mom has been a cop for over 20 years and she is the one who constantly warns me about police aggression and young male cops and told me that if you’re ever alone on a rural road and a cop throws their lights on to put on your four ways and drive to the next gas station before stopping because so many cops are scum and it’s not worth the chance of getting hurt. the fact that SHE feels the need to tell me this shit scares me to death
tons of fish but no dolphins, what a joke
Please take one minute out of your day and watch this. It’s the ugly truth.
I hear no lies.
I did not think she would go there but then she did I literally screamed YAAAAAASSSSS BITCH DRAG THEM LIKE YOU’RE TRYNA WALK A CAT
Deep dark fears